Choose your Deport Option!
By Peggy O’Donnell
You find yourself in immigration court. What? You don’t know why you’re here? Don’t worry! It doesn’t matter. To continue, you’re up next. What’s that? You don’t have an attorney? Well, join the club. Only twenty percent do. Listen, time’s a-wasting. You’ll have all the answers you need in five minutes, after the judge gets done with you. And, today is your lucky day! We’re testing a new way to speed up court proceedings AND give you a say in your own destiny! You can now Choose Your Deport Option™. Here's the form. Choose your story and check the outcome you prefer. That’s it! Then hand it to the judge. And presto, you’re done! No more delays, no more uncertainty. No need to scrape together money for a bond! No applications, no appeals, no money for lawyers. Clean, fast, efficient, and due process free! Here’s a pencil. Choose wisely! Your choice is irrevocable. Good luck! [At this point in Peggy’s creative piece on the terrors of immigrant/refugee deportation, she offers a number of stories and scenarios. Here is a link to the full piece: Hint: There is rarely a happy ending.]
Your Story: Check One
1. Maria Luz Lopez Marin. You are from Mexico and have been in the US for 18 months. You fled a violent former partner in Mexico who vowed to kill you and your new partner. You were arrested by black-masked ICE agents from your apartment in Seattle along with your new partner at 4 am five weeks ago. You have been in the detention center since. The agents forced you to give your two-month old child, born in the US, to a neighbor who you know only to greet on the stairs.
2. Jonatan Milton Mascaro Llort. You are from Honduras. You left your country eight years ago because your mother wanted to keep you away from gang recruitment. She sent you to live with her sister in Auburn, Washington. You earned a GED, and now have your own landscaping business with three seasonal employees. You plan to expand the business to outdoor patios and walkways next year. You were arrested by ICE two months ago, on suspicion of gang involvement, and you’ve been in detention since. You have not ever been involved in a gang. You have a US citizen girlfriend and a one-year-old child. You are afraid that if you return to Honduras, any gang will murder you, since that is common retribution against those who left the country.
3. Jenifer Otuña Claro. You are from Colombia. You received your lawful permanent residence five years ago, based on the humanitarian U visa, which is for victims of crimes who cooperate with law enforcement in the arrest of the perpetrator. You were the victim of a hold-up at the gas station where you worked in Seattle. Your minor children, now teens, were included in the petition and are also permanent residents. You are getting ready to file for your US citizenship after the required five-year waiting period. You were accused of shoplifting two years ago, and briefly arrested, but let go at the police station when the shop clerk said she had mis-identified you. You were picked up by ICE while waiting at your children’s high school to walk them home from an after-school event. You don’t know why you were arrested. Your children were not picked up, and are home alone now. You have been in detention for a month. You are worried about them, about paying the rent on the apartment since you will not get a paycheck for this month, and about deportation to Colombia, where you fear continued violence from the children’s father, from whom you fled nine years ago.
4. Nasrin Ahmadi. You are from Afghanistan. You arrived with Operation Allies Welcome parole in early 2022 with your husband and four minor children under the US Army’s largest non-combatant evacuation effort ever, which brought 12,000 at-risk Afghans to the US in 2021-22. Your entire family remains grateful to the US for providing safety for them against Taliban retribution, and for giving the opportunity for their three girls to be educated. You are a derivative of your husband’s pending asylum application, as are your children. The application has been pending for almost three years, with no information about when USCIS may decide the case. You were arrested by ICE six weeks ago with several others as you were walking into the mosque for a ‘know your rights’ presentation on immigration enforcement. You don’t know why you were arrested. You are terrified that you will be sent back to Afghanistan.
5. Ricky Alfredo Garcia Vasquez. You are 17 years old. You were born in Mexico, where your lawful permanent resident parents were visiting family, and brought to Seattle when you were a few months old. Your parents are now US citizens, as are all your younger siblings. Your parents assumed that you automatically became a lawful permanent resident, and then a citizen, so they did not file for your residence. You were picked up by ICE in Sierra Vista, AZ where you flew with your high school soccer team for a western states match. You explained that you were a US citizen, but ICE did not believe you. You have been detained for five weeks as your parents scramble to file for your residence before you turn 18. You are worried that ICE will deport you to Mexico, where you have aunts and uncles but don’t know them, before the paperwork is approved.
6. Divine Kayembe. You are from the Democratic Republic of Congo. You entered the US four years ago with a visitor’s visa, and applied for asylum within the one-year filing deadline. You fear a return to the DRC since the anti-corruption political party to which you belonged was banned by the current repressive government. International human rights organizations report that members of this party have been executed, tortured, and disappeared.
You have since become engaged to another Congolese, a US permanent resident, and are planning your wedding. You were arrested by ICE agents as you were entering a grocery store, with no explanation. You have no criminal record in the US, but were arrested and held without charges for two days by the DRC government six years ago at a peaceful demonstration for human rights and against government corruption. You wonder if this is the motivation for your arrest by ICE. You have been detained for two months. Because you are now in deportation proceedings, your asylum case will be now decided by an immigration judge on a fast track.
7. Mohammed Abboud. You are a naturalized German citizen, born in Lebanon. You came to Germany at age 10 as a refugee, with your family. You do not have a Lebanese passport, and have never returned to Lebanon. You have aunts, uncles, and cousins in Detroit, California, and Washington who you visit every few years for a month or so, entering on the US visa waiver program for German citizens.
This year, when you presented your German passport at the airport immigration checkpoint, you were taken to secondary inspection, questioned about your supposed ties to Lebanese terrorist groups, and detained. You insist that you have no terrorist ties, but acknowledge that you and your German family members send money to help support those of your family still in Lebanon. You don’t know whether your family members in Lebanon are politically active. The ICE agents told you that since you sent money to family in Lebanon while you were in the US, you violated the terms of your visitor’s visa by supporting terrorism. They revoked your visa.
Your Option: Check One
§ Removal order! You will never be able to return to the US. But don’t worry! Your family can send your clothes and tchotchkes to whatever country ICE decides to send you.
§ Voluntary Departure! You will pay your own airfare and go wherever you can. You must leave within 30 days. You can come back to the US, maybe one day! If you have a US citizen spouse or adult child who can petition for your residence, you’re in luck! They will spend many thousands of dollars on attorney and application fees, and it will take at least three years. Otherwise, enjoy the rest of your life in your country of choice!
§ Uh-oh! The judge was just fired in the middle of the docket! Your case will be re-scheduled in a month to three years. Don’t change your address without informing DHS. And beware, even if you follow the correct procedures, DHS often claims they never receive address change notices. ICE will hunt you down and detain you. You’ll present your case again, this time in detention, without the benefit of Choose Your Deport Option™ .
What’s that? Where’s the option to win your case and stay in the US? Sorry, that’s not a Choose Your Deport Option™. What? You don’t want to participate in the pilot? Oh, well, if that’s the way you feel about it, I am authorized to immediately detain you and put you on a plane to Sudan. No more Mr. Nice Guy. What’s that? Change your mind? Here’s the form! And with heartfelt good wishes, best of luck to you!